Have to, or Get To?

Much can change in a matter of days. All the dread I felt for the future open heart aorta repairs is gone like smoke. The mountain that loomed over my brain and all the questions of a daunting medical hurdle feels as if it's just collapsed and wasn't really a big deal. Perspective is something isn't it? 

Today, we still have more questions than answers, and Steven has more tests in the hopper to get a clearer picture. He received a call from his cardiologist's office to get scheduled and was basically told he has P.A.H., pulmonary arterial hypertension. It sounds basic, we've heard the term hypertension. No biggie. Only this kind is pretty rare, the prevalence, according to Orphanet is 1 to 9 cases for every 100,000 people. This type of hypertension is just plain scary.

We're waiting to hear what his cardiologist has to say and I'm trying to research, while not getting too much into the weeds of worry. I'm looking at tests a few years back and actually finding things that might have been overlooked, so we don't know what stage he may be in. Many sources cite how hard it is to diagnose this disease, as it looks like so many other annoying, but benign things.

As we've learned that in our current state of medical care, doctors seem to be scarcer than in recent years and there seems to be a lot of understaffing still occurring. Just for fun, I looked up job listings for our local medical center. It's concerning just how many physician and nurse positions are vacant. We've noticed an appearance of "overwhelm", especially 6 months ago, when we spent a day in the ER, when Steven had a cardiac episode. It felt so off...so surreal: patients in beds in the hallways and many being treated in the waiting room. Just wild! I cannot imagine how it must feel for medical professionals to function well in those circumstances for any length of time. God bless them for all they do to help others heal.

I've been researching our local pulmonologists, as I believe that's going to be Steven's next referral. I found one that I hope is taking new patients, he's partnered on over a dozen published peer reviewed papers and seems to geek out over pulmonological conditions. 

Sometimes we face something that feels like a have to when really, it might be an "I get to". I don't know if my Love, my best friend will even GET to have his aorta repaired. I've just learned that the Scary Thing I dreaded was a blessing, privilege, and gift. Life has twists and turns and I'm just holding on tightly to my faith in God. In all the terrible and difficult things that may happen in life, there is always beauty and blessing in the mix, if we look for it. Until next time...hug your loved ones and let's all be extra nice to all in the medical profession. :)